Does A Course in Miracles Teach That I Require a Holy Relationship in Order to Awaken?

[Jhon Dolton]

I wish to ask you about what A Course in Miracles means by Holy Relationship. In one the main book it talks about "entering the ark" together, and it almost sounds as though you'll need an added specific person to be able to awaken. Therefore, I think I approach each new person with the expectation that maybe THIS could possibly be the relationship that reflects enlightenment in my experience, and I to them! Am I taking this too literally? Or do you really need another to assist you awaken?

I appreciate your time so much and many thanks for your help in my experience and others. I many thanks and I thank God for you. Namaste.

David Hoffmeister: Thanks for your openness and your willingness to look deeply at what is underneath these topics and issues. A Course in Miracles teaches that the split mind contains both the problem (the ego) and the Solution (the Holy Spirit). When they are brought together, only One remains.

The human body and the world are always the focus of ego's perspective, for it seeks to produce real problems and struggles in the world and to avoid the inner Healing Correction of the Holy Spirit teacher of teachers. The ego's distorted world is the product of identity confusion, an outpicturing of the belief that it's possible to produce an identity which God did not create. The ego is this identity problem and it was Answered or forgiven by the Holy Spirit the instant it seemed to arise. This 1 problem could possibly be described as an authority problem or even a confusion in who is mcdougal of Reality. Your brain that believes in the truth of the time-space cosmos has a get a handle on issue, for it believes that it can make itself. This ego mind also thinks it is in competition with God, although this really is pushed out of conscious awareness. This unconscious ego thought system is exposed in the A Course in Miracles Workbook lessons, and Lesson 13 contains an excellent example of this unveiling:

"A meaningless world engenders fear because I think I am in competition with God."

This really is the beginning of training the mind to forgive, for the focus is brought back to the mind, back again to thinking, and removed from the body and the world. Anorexia, weight issues, body image issues, and interpersonal relationship issues are samples of projection, of seeing the problem where it is not: in the world. Your brain cannot tolerate the belief in a battle with God, so this belief is pushed out of awareness. The deep-seated control issue this type of belief entails is then projected to the body and the world. Weight control, like any attempt to regulate the script or the body, is an attempt to regulate the past. The Holy Spirit teaches that yesteryear can only be forgiven or released or seen as false—not fixed or controlled or changed.

The same ego dynamic is underneath interpersonal relationship struggles of power and control, of wanting to correct or change an individual or even a self-image. Personal relationships may appear to sail happily along for awhile, the make-believe self-concept IS the personal perspective and thus is obviously on shaky ground. Decisions are continuous. The Holy Spirit is a decision. The ego is a decision. Atonement is the decision that ends all decisions, an acceptance of the changelessness of Mind. The ego is the decision to believe that the mind can be separate from God. Once the mind believed that it had separated and built this time-space world, this time-space world of bodies became its substitute identity, as it believed it'd thrown away the Kingdom of Heaven. The planet was made up as a substitute identity. The sleeping mind is split on the decision of identity. The Holy Spirit says, "This world is not Identity. This world can be an illusion." And thus the Holy Spirit reminds the mind constantly, "This world is not your Home. This world is not your Identity. This world is not real." While the mind is split it is hearing another voice (the ego) that's saying: "You've done it. You've separated from God. You'd better make the most effective of it and find something of the world to identify with. You can never return back for God will punish you."

Thought-form associations seem to become a substitute identity. The ego mind seems to be identified with the body, with family, with environments that seem to surround it (i.e., I'm an American, Japanese, I'm male, I'm female, I'm from a rich family, from an undesirable family, I'm Catholic, Jewish, Protestant, etc.) Many of these are thought-form associations. And these seeming other persons and places surrounding the little personal self are typical part of this construction. Your brain is quite shaky about this small identity, this small self, this little me. So the little me is shaky, and it seems like other persons give the little me reality and importance (i.e., you're my son, my daughter, you're my boss, you're a loving father, etc.) and all different issues that these images be seemingly telling this little me be seemingly really important. Praise thus seems very important (i.e., you are an individual and you're a good one!).

Praise and acceptance from others SEEM to stabilize this very shaky thing (i.e., you're a good lover, you're a good provider, you're great with the kids, you have an excellent intellect, you have this type of heart, you help serve so many other folks, you're a good team-player, on and on). This facet of the self-concept says that you're an individual and you have most of these positive attributes that basically cause you to a valuable and worthy person, which make you stick out above the crowd. You're not just anyone—you're somebody special. The flip side is criticism, which directly reflects the shaky sense of self. Criticism could be: you're never as great as you think you are, you're not this type of good team player, this type of good provider, so good in bed—all the things which are taken as insults to the personal self-concept). That's the flip side of the strokes. To this ego self-concept that believes both sides (the positive and negative) of thinking are real, the Holy Spirit is perceived as a good threat, for the Holy Spirit results in the ability of forgiveness or the realization that none of the tiny images perceived as separate have any reality.

When the criticism seems to come, the ego attempts a substitution. It thinks, "I don't need this. I'll go elsewhere and start other relationships with people who will appreciate my talents and skills and abilities, appreciate my personhood. I'll avoid those negative influences in the world and those negative people. I'll find another individual or join an organization where individuals are like-minded and neglect the rest of the world. These new people will require to me and stroke me and praise me." The attempt at substitution is an attempt to keep a sense of specialness, a sense of separation, a sense of individuality (a private mind with private thoughts). Those attempts are special love relationships. They appear to bolster worth and value and to validate personhood. And they offer a false witness for clinging to the ego as identity. To the ego, past associations serve to give personhood some sense of stability and consistency and value. Yet, the Holy Spirit demonstrates past associations offer nothing of value, for these were produced by the ego to deny the truth of God's Love.

Holy relationship emphasizes and reflects Content (right-minded thinking) and comes with an awareness of the meaninglessness of form. While the ego's believed relationships will be seemingly specific, yet each one will present a way to release the belief in specifics. Divine Mind is Abstract and Universal. Forgiveness could be the bridge to the remembrance of Christ and God, Divine Abstraction. Thus the Holy Spirit teaches in A Course in Miracles:

"Once you meet anyone, remember it is a holy encounter. As you see him you might find yourself. As you treat him you will treat yourself. As you consider him you will consider yourself. Always remember this, for in him you may find yourself or lose yourself. Whenever two Sons of God meet, they are given another chance at salvation. Don't leave anyone without giving salvation to him and receiving it yourself. For I am always there with you, in remembrance of you.